Here’s a fun one.
Grab the kids, some instruments, put them in a room, and ask them to record an album.
Regardless of their skill level, they’ll look around at each other, smile, and start making a ruckus.
Soon enough, one of them will turn up the volume and the others will follow. Eventually, one of them will pick up the pace and the others will try to keep up. Things are escalating quickly.
No doubt we’ll see some jumping and some stomping. The energy in the room is building, the kids are screaming, and that cycle continues until they are out of gas, or the police show up.
It’s a fun visual but maybe this hits closer to home.
You’ve pulled the team together for a half day meeting. Strategy headed into the new quarter, direction of the new product, or maybe you just need to decide on lunch. Ideas are tossed around, the white board is filling up, side chatter, eye rolls, opinions, raised voices. The regional manager walks in, somebody’s got to say something smart, quick! The tempo picks up. The temperature is raised.
Am I close?
It’s only natural to ratchet things up. Group dynamics can snowball in that way. Louder and faster. Unfortunately, louder and faster are not synonymous with better.
Playing together doesn’t mean playing all at once.
The military uses the term “cover and move,” although “charge!” gets all the fanfare.
The best meals let each ingredient shine. Ingredients don’t compete, they cooperate.
Basketball, when done well, is about spacing and moving without the ball.
These ideas are true on teams and in the office. With kids and adults. The first step is awareness, and then we can move in a way that takes the temperature down instead of cranking it up.
“I was realizing that a lot of power can come from not hitting the strings super hard all the time, you know, from not filling up all the spaces with notes, from leaving big spaces.” John Frusciante was explaining to Rick Rubin how their collaboration changed the Red Hot Chili Peppers forever.
Looking back on that time, Frusciante was growing as an artist and “wasn’t trying to compete with Flea as far as being busy. Appreciating stuff like Led Zeppelin, where you notice Jimmy Page, his playing, he gives so much space to the drums, he’s often not playing, he’ll often hold a note and leave it to allow the snare drum to be the maximum size that it can be.”
People have this natural tendency to hurry things up, to show that they belong, show that they can contribute, and they lose sight of what makes the group function at a high level.
The most vocal, the most persuasive, and the most exuberant, often get the most accolades. But the work comes together when you give each other space.
You work off of each other not over each other.
Rubin remembered suggesting “not everybody has to play from the beginning of the song. What’s it like if Flea lays out until the chorus, or John lays out to the course? Let’s try. What’s it like if we lay out till the second verse, what does it do? Let’s hear it.” Take the intro, just the melody, add some base, snare, and now we are making music.
When Frusciante started playing that way, a funny thing happened. He noticed “it made Flea sound better, and that inspired him, and he started backing off and not playing quite as busy himself, and we all just got really into listening to each other and supporting each other.”
Sometimes leadership is not the loudest voice in the room. It’s the one that gives space and time for others to grow and contribute.
If you find yourself in a room and the volume keeps building, let it be an opportunity to lead by leaving some space, lead by giving permission.
Our contribution as a leader is bringing out the best in others. Inspiring others. Not through action or cleverness, busyness or effort, but through empowerment.
