Apparently, Spam is not just a term for unwanted email.
It comes from a Monty Python sketch. The comedy troop staged a restaurant where everything on the menu comes with Spam (the yummy canned meat).
You order eggs, and you get eggs with Spam. You order beans, and you get beans with Spam.
No matter what you came for, no matter what sounds good, it’s going to come with Spam.
Enjoy! Come back soon!
Spam is not just those pesky emails, it’s anything you are lacing your product or service with. Anything that you include with everything—that nobody asked for.
You can call it a filler. You can get all high and mighty and call it a “cross-sell” if it helps you sleep at night.
Either way, Monty Python was pointing out a tactic that companies use all the time. You might even use it yourself.
That place with the golden arches does it when they ask, “would you like fries with that?”
They don’t ask because you look hungry. They ask because those fries have healthy margins and they’ve been sitting around a bit too long.
Unfortunately, those potato margins weren’t cutting it anymore. So, they took things up a notch with carbonated sugar water Spam.
These days the question is, “Would you like to make that a meal?”
I know what you’re thinking. Fries and soda are delicious.
True.
I happen to have a special place in my heart for Spam as well. Specifically, the Spam Slider from Maranation in Seattle.
But it’s not something I want or need with every meal.
This is why Spam is confusing.
The person pushing it thinks that they are doing you a solid. Ask Xfinity, and they will proudly tell you how many channels you get with very little mention of how many you watch. Because most of them you don’t. Most of them are Spam. You called becasue you wanted to watch the Mariners game…walked out with 180 channels.
Cable Spam.
Many companies will layer in reporting. That’s what my old firm did. We called it a value-added service (VAS). But it was Spam.
Paper Spam.
I use one of those online budgeting apps, and once a month they call me for a consultation. It’s just ear Spam. It’s Spam being used to try and upsell me on more Spam. Weaponized Spam is the worst kind of Spam.
I’d pay them to not call.
When a company really wants to move a product, they’ll slide it into every nook and cranny. You can’t escape it.
Which brings me to our Spam of the day.
Artificial Intelligence Spam. AIS.
I know, I know, shots fired!
But it’s true. You can’t avoid the stuff, it’s in the water. And in those fries too, if you can believe that.
Don’t get me wrong. I think AI will change everything. I look forward to a personal assistant that actually works, and a robot for every household. I’m eager to see what can be done in medicine, education, and energy.
But when the cook is jamming it into everything on the menu, it’s Spam. Just like Monty Python.
I don’t need an AI enabled microwave and I don’t need an AI enabled playlist. Those questions have been solved.
It’s popcorn and Pearl Jam.
Let’s save SkyNet a few cycles of number crunching.
Spam stands for shoulder of pork and ham, and it was a way to get protein to our soldiers during World War II without required refrigeration. Portable pork! It was a breakthrough during its time.
The more you know, right?
But once the boys were back home, maybe that can of meat wasn’t quite as useful.
It didnt stop Hormel from trying.
And that’s where I am with AI. The same place I was with the metaverse and blockchain and IoT and social and mobile.
It’s excellent, I love it, just not with my eggs.
Maybe that’s the crux of it.
Is it useful? Are customers asking for it by name? Or are we sliding it in where it’s unwanted?
If it’s useful, valuable, and helpful, you won’t need to ask; Would you like AI with that?
If you enjoyed this post, please share it with a friend.
